dear zach.



fuck you. i'm sorry that it frustrates you that you can't be fully comfortable in my apartment because you have to shield your eyes or wait for me to put on my scarf or close the door if you want to leave her room or come to the bathroom. oh. and i'm sorry that sanyieh takes so fucking long in the shower and prevents you from peeing in her bathroom, and when you storm off, telling us to make "whoever's in the bathroom hurry" we don't give a fuck. and i'm sorry that andrea doesn't want you to be her boyfriend but is stringing you along for the sex while keeping other potentials on the side. and i'm sorry that yuxdi threatened to punch you after you "accidently" hit her in the face and then asked if you had hit me. and i'm sorry that you can't see that you look unbelievably pathetic when andrea asks you not to come over and you do anyway. and i'm sorry that daniela sits in the bathroom for 20 extra minutes even though she knows that you have to use it. and i'm sorry that andrea's only keeping you because you bought her maroon 5 tickets. please. take the hint. and stay away.


sincerely,