how to deal.

she's standing there. doing the dishes or drinking water. then she'll casually glance out the window, expecting to see him. after the milisecond of forgetfulness, she'll realize that she won't ever see him outside the window again. so she stops washing the dishes. she stops drinking water. and she sighs. she sighs and she thinks. thinks of all that she should've done, could've done. then she gets angry. infuriated. she hates the creature that did this to him. she hates them all. making something so innocent suffer like that. she wants revenge but doesn't know how to go about it. so she silently prays. prays for retribution. then she realizes how silly she's being. she realizes that someone won't ever see her husband again. someone won't ever see her father again. how alone must they feel if she is feeling like this. and so she is sad again. and when she's sad, she glances out the window.